I just returned from an incredible weekend where God touched my life in so many ways and through so many people. To be absolutely honest, I dreaded this Valentine's Day, the first time I had been single on February 14th since I was 14. But the day was spent with my friends, relaxing and actually doing crazy things. I was removed from "the world" and was spared the crazy people running around with flowers and could really just have fun with my friends. RUF got major points in my book for having 2 fun games (much better than the fall) AND insanely fun sledding. (Need I say that there were two girls who were termed "extremists".. and that I was one of them?) It didn't matter that until the night before there had been no snow, we found a hill in the shade where there was enough snow to go crazy sledding and went wild.. it was so much fun.
I guess the reason I enjoyed the weekend so much was the it was probably the first time since I've been here that I really felt at home.. I wasn't worried about what people would think of me, I didn't feel awkward just sitting in the common room and studying.. I played cards with people I liked until all hours of the night.. I guess I'm coming to realize that RUF really is becoming "mine", in a very good way.. it will never replace Young Life (and I did heave a couple of sighs over missing the winter conference this weekend), but I can still love the people just as much.
The speaker over the weekend was Stuart, the pastor from Grace (and the sermons were the thing about Grace that I wholeheartedly approve of). The first message was on loving God, the second was on loving others. In a "divine moment" that I felt like really hasn't happened in a long time, the second message was made for me. He talked about people that have been so hurt by love that they build up walls and feel like it will just be better for them never to let anyone get close and how that is not part of God's plan at all, and if we let Him teach us how to love and let our love come from Him, then everything will be ok. I was really struggling this week with disillusionment, feeling like there really is no reason to ever let people get close to you because all anyone does is disappoint you and there is no real love in this world, only pain. And his sermon really, really helped me. It was great, because I went into the retreat not expecting any kind of spiritual renewal, but I was so overwhelmed by God's grace and love that it was just really neat. :) (And I remembered all the years that I went to the winter conference longing for renewal, and then was disappointed.)
So now I'm back, relaxed, renewed, and refreshed, and ready to dive into the last few weeks of the quarter.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
Yesterday, a guy asked me to move into his apartment with him.
His name is Aiden, he is four years old, and I am in love. ;) Even though I know I've mentioned this before, I really wanted to reiterate how much I love my job, what happiness it brings me, and how I feel about my kids. Aiden is a completely new blessing: he just started coming a few weeks ago, and has already decided that I am his very favorite teacher. His mom says he talks about me all the time (it's awesome when you realize that not only do you remember them, but they also remember you!). Yesterday, he was having a hard day, and wanted to do absolutely nothing but sit in my lap. In the afternoon, I was in charge of the art area and also of timing the kids' turns at the computer, so Aiden got really good at hopping up every ten minutes and informing the child at the computer that it was time to switch. :)
Just to show you how absolutely precious and wonderful my children are, here are some ridiculous and silly things they said while we were talking yesterday:
Ferran: My daddy works at Northwestern!
Me: Really? That's awesome. Alice, where does your daddy work?
Alice: In a tall building.
Jovan: I can't go outside, 'cause I'm allergic to snowflakes.
Me: Faith, can your sister play the violin?
Faith: Sometimes.
The most heartrending things happened yesterday as well, though. Apparently Ferran's parents are divorced, and every month they fight over who will pay tuition for Ferran to continue to come to school. According to the director, Ferran had already been coming for two weeks without paying, and unless his parents paid, could not continue to come to school any longer. So, at the end of the day, Ferran asked me if I knew "the news" about tomorrow: whether he could come back or not. He was so sad, it absolutely broke me heart. The fact that the parents' arguement was affecting his life so directly and dramatically just seemed.. horrible.
Also, we have a wonderful girl, Jade, who has recently moved into a foster home. All day yesterday, she was absolutely certain that her mommy was going to come pick her up. "My mommy's going to come get me after nap," she told me again and again. Regular pick up time is between 4:30 and 5:30. A handful of children from the entire school stay until 6. As the time moved on, closer and closer to 5:30, Jade kept saying, "My mommy's coming soon! My mommy's coming soon!" And no one came. We moved to the other building, with the "late" children, and she started asking, "Jackie, where's my mommy?" Five minutes before six, a teenage boy walked in, apparently her babysitter at her foster home. Jade went into hysterics, screaming that no, her mommy told her on the phone she was going to come pick her up, no she didn't want to go home with Roy... eventually he took her away, but the difficulties in her life touched and saddened mine.
I guess my work makes me appreciate my incredible and irreplaceable childhood, my wonderful parents, and my full and very happy life. It makes me appreciate the little things in life (like running around with excitement because there's a ladybug in the classroom.. or learning to draw a heart and thinking it's the most incredible thing ever) and enjoy myself every minute.
I LOVE YOU, GROUP E! :)
His name is Aiden, he is four years old, and I am in love. ;) Even though I know I've mentioned this before, I really wanted to reiterate how much I love my job, what happiness it brings me, and how I feel about my kids. Aiden is a completely new blessing: he just started coming a few weeks ago, and has already decided that I am his very favorite teacher. His mom says he talks about me all the time (it's awesome when you realize that not only do you remember them, but they also remember you!). Yesterday, he was having a hard day, and wanted to do absolutely nothing but sit in my lap. In the afternoon, I was in charge of the art area and also of timing the kids' turns at the computer, so Aiden got really good at hopping up every ten minutes and informing the child at the computer that it was time to switch. :)
Just to show you how absolutely precious and wonderful my children are, here are some ridiculous and silly things they said while we were talking yesterday:
Ferran: My daddy works at Northwestern!
Me: Really? That's awesome. Alice, where does your daddy work?
Alice: In a tall building.
Jovan: I can't go outside, 'cause I'm allergic to snowflakes.
Me: Faith, can your sister play the violin?
Faith: Sometimes.
The most heartrending things happened yesterday as well, though. Apparently Ferran's parents are divorced, and every month they fight over who will pay tuition for Ferran to continue to come to school. According to the director, Ferran had already been coming for two weeks without paying, and unless his parents paid, could not continue to come to school any longer. So, at the end of the day, Ferran asked me if I knew "the news" about tomorrow: whether he could come back or not. He was so sad, it absolutely broke me heart. The fact that the parents' arguement was affecting his life so directly and dramatically just seemed.. horrible.
Also, we have a wonderful girl, Jade, who has recently moved into a foster home. All day yesterday, she was absolutely certain that her mommy was going to come pick her up. "My mommy's going to come get me after nap," she told me again and again. Regular pick up time is between 4:30 and 5:30. A handful of children from the entire school stay until 6. As the time moved on, closer and closer to 5:30, Jade kept saying, "My mommy's coming soon! My mommy's coming soon!" And no one came. We moved to the other building, with the "late" children, and she started asking, "Jackie, where's my mommy?" Five minutes before six, a teenage boy walked in, apparently her babysitter at her foster home. Jade went into hysterics, screaming that no, her mommy told her on the phone she was going to come pick her up, no she didn't want to go home with Roy... eventually he took her away, but the difficulties in her life touched and saddened mine.
I guess my work makes me appreciate my incredible and irreplaceable childhood, my wonderful parents, and my full and very happy life. It makes me appreciate the little things in life (like running around with excitement because there's a ladybug in the classroom.. or learning to draw a heart and thinking it's the most incredible thing ever) and enjoy myself every minute.
I LOVE YOU, GROUP E! :)
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